A Valid Birth

Today is my birthday. I was born on this day over a quarter of a century ago. Or was I?

That is the question I was faced with this week. I went to apply for my passport for this summer, but was discouraged first by the forms I had to fill out. They asked for my parents' names and DOBs; I left it blank, assuming since they have passed away, that it didn't matter. The lady helping me said I still had to fill it out. No big deal, except I hate the bitter reminder of their deaths.

The couple right before me were here to get their marriage license. I wish that's why I came, I think as I fill out my parents' information, trying not to feel sad. Comparison, a hateful friend of mine.

All seems to be going fine after this, when I ask her a question regarding my current passport. I received one 7 years ago, so it should still be good, but there is a note in the back that says it expired 6 years ago. She looks over my passport and asks to see my birth certificate. I hand it over and she says, "I'm sorry but your birth certificate isn't valid, so neither is your passport." Confused, I ask why and she explains, "It's missing your parents' names on it."

A dagger, straight to my heart. Has she any idea the pain she is causing me right now? I barely hear her tell me I have to send away for a new birth certificate before I can apply for my passport, as I fight back tears.

Not valid? My birth certificate? Because my deceased parents' names are missing? Was my birth not valid either? Who am I? These are the questions that flood my mind, assailing my heart, my identity. I hurriedly gather my things and rush out, bursting into tears as I walk alone back to my car.

Alone. All alone in this big world. That's how I feel. Does anyone care? Does anyone love me? Am I wanted? Am I valuable? Am I valid?

God must have known I would need a birthday this week. Two days later, I am reminded of the answers to these questions. A wonderful couple from church threw a birthday party for me; I invited friends from every circle here in Tallahassee. Friends, food, love, laughter. I don't deserve all this. I stay after to help clean up and talk with the couple who hosted it. They encourage me, tell me they love me and want me to feel a part of their family. They know they can't replace my parents, and they don't try to, but they want to love me as best they can. They pray for me before I leave, heart filled.

The day before my birthday, my brother calls, wanting to visit. How thankful I am the Lord answered my prayer and brought Ben and Heidi to Jacksonville. Now we can just take a day trip to see each other! I can't wait. My heart is filled again. I talk to my best friend, and she shares that though we are coming together this weekend for our friend's wedding, they also want to have a celebration for me. My heart keeps growing.

As if all that's not enough, I'm overwhelmed today by friends' sweet words, their calls and messages. I get a birthday massage (SO good) and return home just in time to receive flowers in the mail from Ben and Heidi! What a great day!

But what means the most, is the love note from my Heavenly Father. I woke up this morning and see my favorite picture of my parents, hanging above my bed. Their faces smiling, married and happy. This was long ago, before my brother and I were born. I have proof here of their happiness, even if I don't have the memories. Mom is laughing. I can hear it.

I open my Bible to read today's Scripture on my year-reading plan. I come to this verse:

"Is He not your Father, your Creator, who made you and formed you?"
Deuteronomy 32:6

A reminder. Of His love. On my birthday, of all days. Only, I'm a couple days ahead, so this is actually supposed to be read on my mom's birthday. My heart continues to fill. As I read my Creator's words, I am reminded of His love, His care. My mom loved me more than words could express. I try to believe my dad did too, he just didn't know how to show me. But they weren't the ones that made or formed me. My Father knit me together, formed me carefully and uniquely, with intent, with purpose. I am not forgotten. How could I be? He who forms cannot forget the work of His hands. He will never abandon me. The Lord says in Isaiah 49:15,

“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!"

So, even though the week started off with questions, it ends in answers. I am loved. I am valid. I am valuable. Praise the Lord.

Prayer for Japan

こんにちは

Kon'nichiwa!

Yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. My heart grows for the Japanese as our team continues to prepare for our trip this summer. We spent yesterday in prayer for Japan, and I want to invite you to pray with us.

Lord, it has been a year since you allowed the earthquake and tsunami to hit Japan and impact the lives of probably every Japanese soul. I know how the one-year anniversary feels, and I lift up before you these people, and ask that you comfort them. I pray that the Japanese who lost loved ones a year ago would experience comfort, and that one day we might be able to explain to them the God of all comfort (2 Corinthians 1:3-5).

I pray that you would give them strength to clean up debris and courage to rebuild. I pray that you would protect them from further damage. Lord, would you use this as an opportunity, a platform, for the gospel to be shared. Most Japanese have no idea who you are, have never heard the name 'Jesus.' I pray that they would be exposed for the first time today, tomorrow, this summer. Prepare the hearts of these beautiful people who bear your image.

Thank you for all of the lives you spared a year ago. Thank you for the friends I will meet this summer. Thank you for our team. Thank you for your gospel, your grace, your Son.


Scripture I'm praying:

Like cold water to a thirsty soul,
so is good news from a far country.
Proverbs 25:25

For “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? And how are they to preach unless they are sent? As it is written, “How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the good news!”
Romans 10:13-15

そのため、ある

Sonotame, aru
(Amen)

Discipleship: Pass It On

The university campus is a place where students gather from around the world to pursue knowledge; it is also here that God gathers students together to pursue Him. God is using discipleship, the intentional one-on-one mentoring among fellow believers, through university students across the nations, including right here at Florida State.

The apostle Paul wrote in 2 Timothy 2:2, “…and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.” We can observe here a pattern of discipleship: Paul has taught Timothy how to pursue Christ and instructs him to pass it on, but not to just anyone. He urges Timothy to entrust this knowledge to faithful men who will be able to teach others also: that’s at least four spiritual generations.

One of the greatest blessings of ministering on the college campus is being able to see the Gospel being advanced through the third and fourth spiritual generations!

From Paul to Timothy

I have been discipling Emily, a senior studying Marketing, for a year. She is currently in the process of making many life-impacting decisions, so we have been going through a Bible study on Discerning God’s Will and reading Trusting God by Jerry Bridges. Emily has already begun making decisions, and with each one she faces, she is learning how to pursue God.

I love working with college seniors because I have the opportunity to help them think about the future and what it means to labor for a lifetime. Will you pray for my time with Emily as she prepares for life in the “real world”?

From Timothy to Faithful (Wo)men

Emily began discipling Sammi, a junior, a year ago as they spent time together in God’s word and prayer. Emily shared it was then that she “got a glimpse of who Sammi was, and a glimpse of who she could become: a strong woman of God who courageously relies on Him daily.” Since then, they have pursued growth in several areas, including a personal walk with God, leadership and influence, overcoming sin, and humility.

From Faithful (Wo)men to Others

Sammi also co-leads my freshmen Bible study on Tuesday nights. Here she met Jordan; they have recently begun meeting together and initiated an Investigative Bible Discussion group in Jordan's dorm. It is in this group where Jordan has been able to invite the friends she has made on her floor to join her and Sammi and two other students in our ministry to ask questions about Jesus, the Bible, and other spiritual topics in a safe environment. So far, 10 students have joined this group and are being exposed to the Gospel, some for the first time!

What a blessing it is to be part of the Gospel being advanced on the Florida State campus with these young women. Thank you for all of your prayers and support to help make this possible! Please continue praying for these women, that the Gospel would be advanced in and through them, and that we would lose count of the generations that follow after them!

"Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,
and your dominion endures through all generations.

The LORD is faithful to all his promises
and loving toward all he has made."

Psalm 145:13