Stories from the Road

I just got back from an 8 day road trip. The trip was primarily a way to share the vision for next year with many friends in Florida, Georgia, and Tennessee. It was a great trip, and it's so cool to see that as I was dropping off a vision, I was also picking up little lessons along the way.

My first stop was in Orlando. I wanted to sit down with one of my oldest friends, Michelle, and share my heart with her. She already knew most of the things I had to tell her, because she has been there throughout it all. But it was so great to really lay out the journey of how God has brought me to this point, and how she has been a part of it and can continue to be! What I didn't know as I was sharing with her was that she had already committed to give online! The Lord is so faithful! How crazy is it that He already provides for me before I even do my part? As I reflect, that's one thing I'm learning in new ways is that God is more faithful than I could ever be or ever imagine. PTL.

Another lesson I learned in Orlando was that part of being faithful is being flexible. I had also asked Michelle if she knew of any of her friends that would be interested in hearing more about what I'll be doing next year and the ministry at FSU. She went above and beyond what I had hoped for in putting together a group of her friends from small groups at church, and even made a Facebook event to invite people. Well, as the day got closer, more and more people had last minute plans and couldn't come. I was starting to feel slightly discouraged about that, but was determined to make the most of it: I was going to remain faithful, even if no one showed up. That night was originally going to be a small group presentation with desserts, but only one of Michelle's friends ended up being available and able to come. I was excited to have someone to share with! However, time began to be against me- this friend of Michelle's had only a limited time to stay. In the end, I only had about 45 minutes to meet, get to know, and share with this woman. But I was so encouraged! She is so sweet- also a teacher- so we had plenty to talk about. I was only able to give her the abridged version of my presentation to share the main points and God's vision and call on my life. At the end I asked her how I could be praying for her, and we were connected in yet another way. She shared with me about a friend who has cancer and is not doing too well. She couldn't even speak; this is one of her dearest friends. I know all too well what her heart is feeling and it was a joy to sit there and pray with her.

Praise God that the funding journey is truly a ministry in itself! I really love to love people, and this summer has been filled with opportunities not just to share with friends, but to encourage and love them as well. Would you believe that even though I just met this woman for only 45 minutes and shared only briefly about what the ministry is all about, the day after I got back to Tampa I received a gift in the mail from her! How amazing.

After spending about 2 days in Orlando with Michelle and some other friends, I headed up to Atlanta, GA! Jackie, my closest friend, just moved up to live in Atlanta with her family after finishing her two years with the EDGE Corps. She is working this summer at a science camp, so I arrived just after she finished for the day. Our time was short because I had to leave the next day, but we made the most of our time and it was a great visit! We had dinner with her family and then went out to Dairy Queen to catch up. Obviously, spending time with Jackie is always encouraging, and this visit was no different. We got to share stories about what's been going on, and I got to hear about the most recent developments in her search for a full time teaching job in the fall. We got to encourage each other, and I also got to share my presentation with her! However, it was so strange to share with her because she knows it all! She knows every story I have to share and she's also been down this road before because she just finished EDGE! But it was still great to share anyways!

I spent the next morning in Atlanta working on fund raising at Atlanta Bread Company, and then made my way to Cleveland, TN! It's here that one of my mom's best friends, Kathy lives. It is always so wonderful to spend time with her and her family- they've become like family to me over the past 14 years. I'll be honest, with my mom gone, part of me struggles to feel like a daughter anymore, but whenever I come to visit them, I get to experience what that's like again. I am so blessed to have them in my life.

We spent time in Chattanooga and Gatlinburg and it was very refreshing. I think that's another thing I learned on my trip: to let yourself be refreshed. I get so busy and focused on what I have to do, that sometimes I forget to take a break and allow freedom to be renewed. We can't do much of anything if we're running on empty, and it was along this road trip that my tank was filled again.

On Sunday, I was blessed again! Zach, a fellow EDGEr, lives in TN, so we were able to plan a time to meet up halfway between us! It was so great to see someone again who knows exactly what I'm going through. We spent some time sharing stories of our F2Fs and how we were doing so far, as well as encouraged each other to keep going strong! Through this I was reminded of yet another lesson: I am not in this alone! I have tons of friends who are doing the same thing at this very same time, and we are all experiencing the same emotions, challenges, and victories. Though we are spread out across the U.S. we are all in this together, for one reason- to get on campus and impact students through the gospel.

Once I returned back to Cleveland, I was able to sit down with Kathy and Mika and share my presentation with them. It was SO good to share with them! This is one F2F I have been looking forward to since I came on staff! They love the Lord and were so encouraging and supportive. And it was amazing to share the whole story, because they knew me even before I was a Christian, they know the long and hard journey I've been on, because they've been on it with me. I was so blessed by them and their encouragement; they committed to being an anchor donor! Praise God!!!! I am constantly amazed at the Lord's provision.

The following night, Kathy had invited several friends and neighbors over for snacks and desserts and to hear my story and presentation. My first small group! It went very well. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be! Again, I was amazed at how this process is not just about getting on campus, which is the end goal, but the journey getting there is all about ministry! There were a few senior boys who will be going off to college next year, and I pray that this grows a curiosity in them for Jesus and for college ministry. I pray they find a ministry when they get on campus next year!

And if that weren't enough, I found out the next morning that Kathy and Mika had another small group opportunity for me to share that night with their small group from church. But get this: it's a biker group! That's right, you know the groups of motorcycles you see riding around town, leather pants and jackets, Harley gear and all. I have only been on the back of a motorcycle twice in my life. Immediately, I was intimidated about sharing with them. Me? Share my story in front of a crowd of tough, Harley-riding bikers? I began to wonder what they would think of this young, blond girl from Florida, a girl who wears pearls and pink, who wanted to share her testimony and God's call on her life. Really, God? I can't do this, I thought. But, as God has proved over and over again, He is faithful. It was through this experience that I learned a lesson on judging people. Now, don't get me wrong, I wasn't judging them in a way that I thought anything bad about them; I simply judged the fact that they were bikers so I assumed pieces of a stereotype, that we would have nothing in common and that they wouldn't be interested in anything I had to say. Well, I was wrong. We met at a little restaurant down the street in a back room and even though I might have looked out of place, I didn't feel like it.

There were about 18 of us as we ate dinner together, and I got to know a couple of them a little better. Even though they may ride motorcycles, they were just really down to earth and normal people! It was great! At the end of dinner, one of the men asked if I would like to share with the group- Kathy introduced me, and I shared my presentation. As I stood in front of them to share and looked around the room at these new faces I no longer saw a group of bikers. I began to see a group of believers, which is exactly what they were! Their smiles and approving glances made me realize that they were for me, not against me! After I finished, many of them came up to me and genuinely thanked me for sharing, that they were really encouraged by my story and excited for what I'll be doing. I got to talk to a couple people more personally and share even more of my heart with them! I don't know how God plans on using that opportunity, but we'll see as I follow up with them! Don't judge a book by its cover and don't be afraid to step out and take big risks. Lesson learned.

I had to leave to head back to Tampa the next morning, but I left feeling really encouraged about the people I had met with and the time I was able to spend with them. God really is good. Here's to unexpected opportunities, time with friends, making the most out of each day, and always learning lessons along life's journey.

Sacrifices

I've very recently had the opportunity to reflect on sacrifice. It's something that is required of us; in any relationship, in any choice we make there is always some element of sacrifice. It's part of life and it's part of love. Christ made this evident in the greatest sacrifice the world has ever known.

I knew full well going into ministry was going to require sacrifice, how could it not? I was ready and willing to make the necessary sacrifices expected. Giving up a secure job. Check. Leaving familiar places and faces. Check. Letting go of comforts such as my own room. Check. But what about the unexpected sacrifices, the ones that really matter, the ones that test our faith?

Let me explain. I have a sweet and wonderful pet dachshund named Tina. Now Tina is not just some ordinary pet dog. Tina belonged to my mom. When my mom was diagnosed with cancer, Tina was more than just a pet; she provided her with therapy, with comfort, with a friend. I couldn't always be at home with my mom because she wished for me to finish my degree in Tampa so that she could see me graduate from college, but I always knew that my mom was never alone because she had Tina; this dog literally never left her side. At the end of my mom's life, she started growing worried about what was going to happen to this dog after she passed away- naturally she wanted to make sure she was well taken care of and had a loving home. As I tried to think of who would take the best care of her, I ended up realizing that I'd really love to keep her. I told my mom that she didn't have to worry, I promised her that I was going to take care of Tina.

It goes without saying that this year has been a difficult one. My mom will always be the most significant loss of my life, and it has changed me forever. But somehow, I've made it through one year, made it through all of the "firsts." The first Thanksgiving, the first Christmas, the first birthdays, the first Mother's day, not to mention the first big decisions without her. But I haven't done it alone; I've had wonderful friends to help me along the way, including Tina. In a year of darkness, Tina has always been a piece of sunshine. I come home from a long day of work, Tina is there to greet me with a wagging tail. If I'm missing my mom, Tina is there to cuddle with and hold close. If I need to get out of the house, she's always ready for a walk! She has become so special to me because just as she was there for my mom when she was sick, Tina has been there for me as I've walked through this year. She is one last piece of my mom that I have to hold onto. She honestly has brought so much joy into my life this year.

So as we are planning for next year's housing arrangements, we will be renting a home from former FSU staff, and their house is a no-dog zone. Part of me knew this was a possibility, but I was just trusting the Lord with it, not worrying too much about it, or even thinking much about it- it was out of my hands, so what could I do? I found out over the weekend that I couldn't bring her with me, and I was absolutely crushed. I was immediately overcome with an overwhelming flood of emotions. All of a sudden I was faced with the greatest sacrifice I must make so far of this journey. Honestly, it brought back so many of the emotions I've tried so hard to forget. A rush of sadness and loss came over me as I stood there trying to digest this piece of information. I was brought back again to how I felt last year when my mom passed away; giving up Tina, even if only for a time, feels so much like losing my mom all over again. I already did that once, and these feelings stirred by this reality made it feel like God is having me do it a second time. Having to come to grips with this loss just reminds me so much of everything I've already lost. I was faced with one more loss, one more thing to grieve, and after all I've already lost I just felt like screaming, "No! Enough! I can't take this anymore!" Haven't I been through enough Lord? I'm so tired, physically, emotionally, spiritually, of grieving and loss. Must I give up Tina too? And I began to realize shortly after that I was beginning to believe I was letting my mom down, breaking the promise I had made to her before she passed away that I would take care of Tina. How can I live with that?

I've had a couple days to process, and a couple days to spend with Tina. I know in my head that I am not breaking any promises and that my mom would never hold this against me, she would understand. And she cared infinitely more for me than any dog. I'm praying now that someone in Tallahassee would be willing to take in a sweet dog for a while- we'll see how God will provide for this as well.

I've also spent some time reflecting on Scripture to see what God has to say about this, and three passages come to mind. The first passage I was brought to was Genesis 22: Abraham's sacrifice of his only son:

"Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, "Abraham!"
"Here I am," he replied. Then God said, "Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about." Early the next morning Abraham got up and saddled his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut enough wood for the burnt offering, he set out for the place God had told him about. On the third day Abraham looked up and saw the place in the distance. He said to his servants, "Stay here with the donkey while I and the boy go over there. We will worship and then we will come back to you." (Genesis 22:1-5)

God tested Abraham. Whenever we are faced with great sacrifices in our lives, we can assume there is some test included in it. God wants to stretch us to the limit to see how far we are willing to go in obedience to him. If you think about it, when you're trying to stretch something, it becomes more elastic each time you pull the two ends. In the same way, each time God stretches us, we become more elastic, more flexible, and more willing to go further than the last time.

I was struck by Abraham's attitude here. God called him to sacrifice his son. His only son. His very precious son whom he loves. You know, the son through whom God had made this promise: "He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be." (Genesis 15:5). But Abraham doesn't gripe and complain and get angry at God. No, he simply gets up early the next morning and sets to work following God's instructions. Why? Because he trusted God! He believed God's promise was true and if God made that promise, He was going to keep it. It may not have made very much sense to him that God would call him to sacrifice the very son he had given him, through whom he was planning on creating nations. But Abraham didn't have to understand, he just had to remain faithful and obedient.

If we continue to read on in Genesis 22, we see that God spares Isaac and blesses Abraham for his faithfulness:

When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. But the angel of the LORD called out to him from heaven, "Abraham! Abraham!"
"Here I am," he replied.

"Do not lay a hand on the boy," he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."(verse 9-12)

I love Abraham's response! For the second time he simply replies, "Here I am." Wow. I need to be like that. Whenever God calls, even when he calls me to follow through challenges, hardships, losses and sacrifices, I should always remain available to him with a simple, "Here I am."

And what happens next? God himself provided the sacrifice! I love what Abraham calls the mountain where all of this took place: The LORD Will Provide. Amen. That's all I can say, especially as I continue to watch the Lord provide for me. I trust the Lord will provide a home for Tina.

So just what was this promise that God made to Abraham?

"The angel of the LORD called to Abraham from heaven a second time and said, "I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me."(verse 15-18)

So, because of Abraham's obedience, we are blessed! That is no measly pinky promise! God promises us big things, but we must believe him for it.

The second passage that comes to mind is The Cost of Being a Disciple in Luke 14.

Jesus starts it out with this:

"Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple." (verse 25-27)

Wow, he doesn't waste any time at all. Tina may be important to me, but she's not my mom, and God calls us to leave even our mother behind. He calls to leave behind our very life. I cannot hold on to anything in this life if I am going to follow Christ. Everything must be held with an open hand.

Jesus goes on,

"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.' (verse 28-30)

As Jesus explains here, before we commit to something, we must be sure we are willing to follow it through with all of the necessary sacrifices it will require. There is a serious Cost for commitment. There always is. Like I said, when I committed to this ministry, I knew it included sacrifice. Can I now at this point turn around and say, "No, that cost is too great"? If I do, then I was never committed to begin with.

When we make decisions like this one, we must ask ourselves, does the gain outweigh the cost? So what am I gaining here in giving up something I love? I cannot tell you their names yet, but every student I meet on campus and God allows me to impact, I am gaining that as a reward. Many students who might not know the Lord yet are about to step on campus in the fall and come into contact with me or some other member of my team and might be introduced to Him for the very first time. Is that worth the cost? Every penny.

Jesus goes on in this passage in verse 33,

"In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple."

Pow. There are no loop holes here. If God calls us to sacrifice something, if we are truly his disciple, there is no question about what we should do. So I ask myself, do I really want to be the Lord's disciple? And my answer is undeniably YES.

And the last piece of Scripture is not any one verse or passage; it's the central figure of it all- Christ. I am reminded of Jesus in the Garden:

"Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." (Matthew 26:39)

Jesus prayed that if there be some other way, then that would be great. But above all, he prayed for the Lord's will to be done, even if that meant the greatest sacrifice of all: his life. Jesus laid down everything. He laid down his life for me, how can I not lay down this sacrifice for his sake? Jesus traded his his life for mine, is he not worthy of every sacrifice I am capable of making? He is worthy. Jesus faced death on my behalf, so that I would never have to face it. He experienced every loss, every betrayal, every pain, every suffering, every mocking, every humiliation. He endured separation from God so that I would never have to. There is no sacrifice I could ever make that would even compare. Praise God for his obedience. Is it not crazy to think that if Jesus had not been obedient, then none of this would even matter because I would have no hope at all? No hope. But Jesus is obedient, and he is faithful, which means that there is hope- and it is this very hope that I seek to offer to students on campus next year!

So that's where I am. Facing a sacrifice, but one worth making. It is no less difficult to make, but as Abraham said, "Here I am." I am willing to lay down whatever it costs. There is so much more to be said on this topic, and perhaps I will continue to reflect on it in days to follow. Stay tuned.

The Birds

I sat outside of Panera yesterday, waiting for a friend, and ended up entranced by the simplicity of the birds. There was a piece of bread on the asphalt; normally I wouldn't have even given it a second thought, but considering my current journey it caused me to stop and reflect. Jesus says in Matthew 6:25-27

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

I sat there and watched this bird as it discovered this chunk of bread and tried to begin its meal. However, it was much too big and the bird's beak too small to really consume it. I was amazed as I watched this little bird carry the bread to a puddle and drop it in to soak up the water, making it quite soggy, allowing him to easily pick pieces away and eat his lunch! Honestly, he seemed so happy without a care in the world.

As I observed this bird, I was struck by the thought of how this piece of bread came to even be there in the first place. The bird did not sew seeds, harvest grain, or bake any bread. Nor did he hunt this tiny meal down in the wild. And what about the person who was responsible for this morsel? I'm sure they did not buy the bread with the intention of leaving a piece for the birds, nor would they be in want after losing it in the parking lot. No, there was no intent other than the Lord's to feed his precious birds. It was by his hand this small piece of bread came to fall upon the ground and by his will that this bird would discover it.

So it is with us! "Are you not much more valuable than they?" Of course! Later in Matthew 10:31, Jesus says, "you are worth more than many sparrows." If God cares so much for these birds of the air, then how much more intensely does he care for us as well? What a vital perspective to keep in mind as I trust the Lord to provide for me. I have no need to worry. God will provide what I need as he sees fit, and I will never be in want, as the first verse of Psalm 23 reminds us! I just need to live life following as he leads, and I will come across these little "pieces of bread" as He drops them along the journey. Jehovah Jireh, the Lord will provide.

"The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want." -Psalm 23:1

"Home" again

I left for my first funding trip yesterday afternoon. Though it's my first, I also believe it will be my hardest. The thing is, I'm now in Fort Myers, my "home" town; I use that term so loosely because this place is not my home anymore. It's so hard to come back here since my mom passed away last year. If I'm being honest, I really hate this place. Not because of the town itself (it's not a terrible place, not my favorite though either), but because of all the memories that are here. Everywhere I go I'm reminded of my mom and all the things I've lost along with her, of how my life has been altered forever.

I grew up here. This was once home. I lived here from the time I was 2 until I left for college at 18, and came back so often to visit my mom. I used to love coming back to visit. Walking in the door of our now empty house yesterday, I was reminded of all the times I came home and I'd walk in and call, "Mom!" I'll never be able to call out for her again, and this place reminds me of that every time. The house is a reflection of how I feel when I think about these things: empty, sad, lonely.

Normally, I come back here every 4-8 weeks to maintain the house, do yard work, or take care of anything else related to my mom's estate. This time is different. I've never come back here with an additional purpose, and because of that, this trip has been different so far. It's still hard to be here, but I'm reminded again of 2 Chronicles 20, this time verse 12:

"For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you."

I'm keeping my eyes on the Lord and what he is doing here and what he is preparing me for in the future, instead of looking back and being attacked by the past. It's been very encouraging so far.

I arrived last night and had a F2F at 7 with the parents of one of my closest friends. This family has taken me in over the past 10 years as part of their family, and I was delighted to share with them what God is doing. I even got to share with them for the first time my testimony, in which their daughter, my friend Michelle, has a significant role. You see, I don't come from a Christian family upbringing. I met Michelle when we were in 8th grade and was immediately accepted by her family. She remained one of my best friends through high school (and continues to remain one of my closest friends) and it was our senior year that I was invited by one of our friends to go to church. I was extremely hesitant because I didn't know anything about God or the Bible and thought I would be asked questions I didn't know the answer to, but Michelle was very encouraging and said that she would even go with me to this church and check it out as well. So we both went and it was through this church at the end of my senior year over the summer that I accepted Christ. That summer I realized that it wasn't about knowing about God from a distance or knowing all the Bible stories, but there was a relationship with Him to be had, a deep and very personal relationship that offered me the grace that I so desperately longed for. Six years ago this month I committed my life to living for Christ, and it has never been the same.

Sharing this with Michelle's parents was awesome, but was even greater for me was hearing their side of the story. They knew how I hadn't been raised in a Christian home, and were always so welcoming to me. Michelle's whole family (5 kids!) always attended church together, so when Michelle came home one day after school and told her parents that she wanted to go to a different church they were a little surprised. But she explained that I'd agreed to go if she went with me, and so her parents told me last night, "If it's going to get Victoria to church, then let her go!" To see how they supported Michelle's decision to go with me was so encouraging, and it's so cool to look back and learn new details of God's intricate and sovereign plan to lead me towards Himself!

Anyways, my F2F with them went really well! Of course it was super relational because we had so much common ground and things to talk about, but at the end they shared that they would be happy to support me because they have seen personally in the lives of their own children how the Navigator ministry impacts students and deepens their faith. I left feeling really encouraged and continually amazed at how God is at work.

Another praise to the Lord is that this past weekend I emailed the missions pastor at my church here in Fort Myers, telling him a little about what I will be doing with EDGE Corps, sent him my letter, and asking if it would be possible to meet with him this week. He told me we would love to and to call to set up an appointment. So on my way down here yesterday I talked to his secretary and she said there was time to meet with me this morning at 11! Wow! I wasn't sure what to expect or how this might differ from my other F2Fs, but I just felt so much peace about how God has worked this all out so well, and walked forward in faith. Our meeting went so well! It was a lot different since he is a representative of this church and since we had never met before, but it was so awesome to share with him the part that this church has played in the journey leading to this point. I wouldn't be a follower of Christ if it weren't for the faithful members of this church! He wanted to know the details of what the navigators is about, my involvement with them, and he was very intentional about asking about my specific needs and how I was hoping for them to partner. I shared with him all that I could and told him my budget and he was surprised at how little time there is to raise that much support, but I told him honestly how God has already been faithfully at work providing for me, and I have total faith that he will provide all that I need in order to get me on campus. He was really interested in the ministry and my story and told me he wanted to meet again, next time with the whole mission's committee so that I can share with them God's vision and call so that they can know exactly what it's all about. In fact, he said, some of the members will be there tonight at church and he invited me to come back to meet them! He's going to introduce me personally so that they can already have a face to my name! Amazing! I don't know exactly how God will use these people to partner with the ministry, but I have complete faith that he will! I know the pastor I met with is really excited about this and about introducing me tonight! I'm praying BIG for this opportunity!

I think so far that's one thing I've been learning through this journey: to pray BIG and take big risks! I serve a mighty God- "I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?" Jeremiah 32:27. There is no point in limiting God, in taking only small steps. I have been challenged through this to step out in new ways and trust God. When I emailed this pastor, I didn't even know if he would have time to meet me, let alone be really interested in what I'm doing, but there was no harm in sending an email. God totally rewards risk, but how can he reward us if we don't step out and trust him? We can never limit God, but we limit what he blesses us with when we don't ask for it.

All in all, coming back here was intimidating. I was not looking forward to it, wanting to just get down here and get it over with. It's never easy to come back, to step foot in my mom's empty house and be forced to remember how much I miss her. But I was also reminded two days again, in my F2F with the generous couple I mentioned in the previous post, of something good. She said that she is so excited about what I am doing, and even though my mom isn't here to witness what God is doing and how he is planning on using the trials permitted in my life to reach the lives of students, my mom would be proud of me. And I think she's right. My mom always, always supported me in anything I did, and this wouldn't be an exception. Especially since my mom trusted the Lord at the end of her life, she would be my number one fan. She always was, and always will be. And I am consistently reminded of that, especially being here.

Though I haven't even been here a full 24 hours, I am again amazed and encouraged at the favor the Lord has shown me. I know I'm still at the beginning, but I am really enjoying the challenge and blessings of the journey of raising support.

One more thing- I've also been reminded of a verse I read on the plane on my way back from Summit, as I embarked upon this journey:

"We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ. For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you, because our gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake." 1 Thessalonians 1:2-5

As I follow the Lord even when he calls me to hard places, to meet with unfamiliar people, and hold out in faith that he will provide, I think of all that journey with me. I am constantly reminded that I am not alone. My fellow laborers, be encouraged by this. I thank God for all of you :) And keep these verses in mind. Let your work be produced by your faith in our Lord, let your labor always be prompted out of love for Christ and his kingdom and for all those who know and love the Lord and those who have yet to believe, and always persevere, letting your endurance be inspired by the hope that we have in the gospel! It get's me so excited to think about how God has uniquely chosen us all to a certain ministry and it is towards this ministry that we must faithfully follow. Never lose sight of what he is calling you to! Remember how the gospel has impacted you- in it's truth, but also in its power! This is why we raise support; to get on campus, live among students for their sake, in hopes that the gospel and the Lord's kingdom would be advanced! Praise God.

That's all for now! Together with you all :)

Highlights

Well, I've never had a blog before and never thought I'd have one. I always thought they were kind of a waste of time. But I decided to give it a try since I have some exciting opportunities and stories to share!

This past year after I graduated from college I've remained here in Tampa, working and teaching at a local middle school as a math teacher, but the Lord has been gently nudging my heart to let go of this job for a while and trust him in going into full-time ministry with the Navigator's collegiate ministry, EDGE Corps. I will be moving up to Tallahassee in August to work with college students on the Florida State campus, leading Bible studies and investigative Bible discussions, engaging students in one-on-one mentoring and discipleship, and sharing the gospel with students who are curious about Jesus or may never have even heard of his name!

I am so excited about what God has called me to do and there's so much to share, but not enough time to write it all down at once! My hope for this blog for now is that it would be a way to communicate what God is doing at the Florida State campus through our ministry with the Navigators. But before I can get on campus to minister to students, I must trust the Lord with a team of people who will pray faithfully and give cheerfully through financial gifts.

My hope for this blog is not that it would be another outlet to invite people to join me in this ministry (although it is available for such a reason as well!), but that it would be a collection of stories and "victories" to share with others, encourage my fellow laborers, and offer praise to God along the way as I follow Christ to Florida State. The journey is long and winding, but it's only just begun! I can't wait to see what's next!

Like I said, the journey has just begun, and the beginning includes a LOT of trusting God. I've had to trust God with a lot throughout the past couple years, but never with my entire livelihood! Even when my whole world was spinning, I still had a job to rely on every day to provide for myself. I still have a job to do, but now I must rely totally on God to provide for me. It's been neat though, to see God show up in very unexpected ways. I know there's a lot left to experience, but I'm already so amazed at what He's done so far.

Let me explain. I returned back from our EDGE Corps training about 11 days ago, and immediately dove into getting out there, sharing God's vision for my life and the FSU ministry. We have what are called "face-to-faces" (F2F) where we meet with friends, family, and other acquaintances to cast vision for how God has been at work in our lives, how he has called us to the EDGE Corps ministry, and how they can join our team and be a part of the great work that he is doing. I had my first F2F the day after I got back from training, and have had one nearly every day since then! I thought I was going to really dread this part of raising support, but it has turned out to be the most encouraging and fun part of the process! I now look forward to each F2F because I get to connect with people and get them excited about what God is doing and how we all can be a part of it!

So far, I've gotten to meet with some great friends, and I just wanted to share the highlights of some of my F2Fs:

Before I even left Summit, our training, God was already surprising me. On our last day of training, they want us to practice our F2F with someone we don't really know or have never met and receive feedback. We were assigned partners, and I was blessed to have met with Cynthia twice before that day in a couple of counseling sessions (a whole other amazing story!). I sat down with her and shared my presentation of God's vision and calling on my life to do EDGE Corps and it was going well. It was like a role play- she was pretending to be a woman I had recently met and was giving me answers to questions almost in a character role. I came to the point of inviting her to join my support team and when she brought out her check book, I naturally thought she was still role playing. Then she started writing in it and I became a little confused. She said, "I actually do want to support you, Victoria!" Wow! I was kind of in shock and didn't know how to respond, not wanting to freak out I tried to keep my cool, but I just beamed and said, "Cynthia, you're my first donor!!" It was awesome! I was so blessed to have had the opportunity to meet her and do my first F2F with her. And I left Summit with my first donor! What a blessing! PTL!

The first big encouragement after training was in a F2F with a friend who has "grown up" in Navs with me. I met with Jon 3 days after returning to Florida and was looking forward to catching up with him and inviting him to join me. At the end of our F2F we spent a while mutually encouraging one another in our current endeavors and he shared something with me that got me really excited and challenged me to pray BIG and trust God for specifics. I told Jon that I trusted that God could provide for me, but it was scary that it is such a short period of time. He shared with me that he had been reading in Nehemiah and encouraged me that God rebuilt the wall in only 52 days! He said that's what he was going to start praying for me: that God would have me fully funded, able to be on campus in 52 days. I pulled out my phone to count the days and see where that put me, and would you believe that 52 days from the day I met with Jon is the day that freshman move into the dorms at FSU!!! How sick awesome is that?! I shared that with Jon and we both got excited about that, and that's my prayer now. I'm praying big, and I'm praying specific. Not only that, I'm learning to pray with full abandonment, trusting that God will provide how he pleases; I can by no means put a time limit on God, but I can pray with faith that he would answer a specific prayer!

So that was about a week ago- 44 days left :) It's been a slow process getting this funding ball rolling. It's not easy starting from scratch. There's a long stretch of road separating 0% and 100%. But that road is not taken alone! God has been faithful and mighty to save! My F2Fs have been really encouraging and I have total faith that nearly all of my friends will give at some point, but it's hard for many of them to commit just yet. I was feeling slightly discouraged the past couple days with a lull because of the July 4th holiday, but was really looking forward to upcoming F2Fs.

That's why I'm finally posting today! Because God really reminded me of how present and totally in control he is!! I had 2 F2Fs scheduled (one only planned since last night!) almost back to back. The first one I was looking forward to catching up with a friend I hadn't seen in a few weeks. I was sort of expecting him to give because I know he has a great heart and a love for our college ministry, but I wasn't sure what to expect exactly. Well, once I shared with him God's call and vision and invited him to be a part of my team, he told me he had already been praying about it and how to give! Right there on the spot he committed to be an anchor donor!!!! WOW! My first anchor donor :) SO exciting!! I am so blessed by God and my friends, I can't even believe it.

Okay, as if that wasn't enough for one day, like I said, I had another F2F a couple hours later. Now this one I had been looking forward to for months! That's right, months. Back in March I was co-teaching with a woman at work and she and I were getting to know each other and she asked me what my plans for next year were. I decided to be honest with her (not knowing where she was spiritually at this point) and tell her about EDGE Corps. Now I should explain that this was back in March, only a few days after turning in my application, not having been accepted yet. She got so excited about it! It turns out she is a believer, and she went home and shared what I told her with her husband and the next day approached me and said, "I talked with my husband last night about what you're going to be doing with the Navigators and we would really like to support you." I hadn't even really mentioned the fact that I would be raising support! And from that point on we continued to become friends and she would check in all the time asking about EDGE and wanting to know more and how she and her husband could be involved. I told her once I got back from training I would call her so we could meet and I could tell her more. All that to set up what happened tonight. One reason she is so excited is that she has 2 teenagers, one of which is a senior and wants to go to FSU next year! It's been a very difficult year for this family with teenage issues and behavior, which she was able to share some personal things so that I could be praying for them. They had me over to their house to share my presentation with them and they are so responsive and excited! Then she and I went out to dinner after and kept talking, sharing stories, and getting to know one another. It was amazing! By the end of the night she said, "I hope this doesn't sound weird, but I am so thankful that the Lord put you in my life. It's been hard having two teenagers who don't want anything to do with you. But it's been wonderful to get to know you and connect with you, despite the age difference. It's so nice to talk to someone young who doesn't hate you and actually wants to talk to you! I know I could never ever replace your mother, but I hope you can feel similarly and have an older woman figure to talk to as well!" Bless her heart, I nearly started crying! Then she said, "I saw that you had something hanging down from your car and I want to write you a check right now to have it fixed." Can you believe that?! She wrote me a very generous check and told me if it's too much to put it towards funding. Then she told me how much she and her husband are committing to give monthly. So far it's my biggest gift and my jaw was nearly on the ground!! I couldn't believe their generosity!! Even more so, I couldn't believe God's faithfulness! Two anchor donors in one day. Please. I can't believe it.

Whew. That was long winded, but I just wanted to get them down now! More stories and updates to come!

A verse I've been clinging to and gently reminded of by the Lord:

"This is what the LORD says to you: 'Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's." 2 Chronicles 20:15

Just getting started...more to come!